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when i was a kid. i never felt good enough. never felt like i could be
in the "in crowd" i felt like i always needed to be the center of
attention i used to starve myself. just to fit in to be skinny and cut
to get the kind of attention i'd always wanted. all i got were more
people leaving me. thinking i was "emo" "gothic" just different things
people dont understand and i guess you'd actually have to cut to
understand it. my mother died while giving birth to me. so my dad beat
me. i had fifty scars inflicting my body. they were for every fake i
love you. i finally realized i needed help. i set my mind to it for
about a month then it got worse. i then realized things will always get
worse before they can ever get better. i was mostly the biggest teenage
drama queen but better yet becoming somebody i didnt know. and it was
very shamefull for me. then i started attending one of my friends
churches. and found god. and confided in him. i started writing in my
journal in different colors of pens. like pink if i was happy that day.
blue if i was sad ect.ect. i found a way i could get away from cutting.
too this day i live to tell my story; free of depression. free of rape;
free of abuse; living a happy, care-free-christain life.
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