hello,my name is david 

i grew up watching mom get hurt alot by father and was so helpless to be of any help for her.i felt so bad for being powerless over her pain.alot of pot was smoked there and much abuse.i am only now finding out all this was even abuse.i had enuff fuel for my self injury fire...at age 14 i had start cuttuing dailly as was a skater boy.i was in such pain lack of love at home and not being able to help mom etc.so i would hurt myslef to feel better or such.i dont know or have most of the truama from child hood blocked .the feeling flood in often and afecct me to this day.i still cut some but am trying to learn how not to and to relieve the hurt in other ways .recently i was hitting bottom with si and nothing would take the pain away nothing worked anymore and tryed to commit suicide was in critacal care unit and after release tryed it again a week later.i dont have much of a war story to tell i mean i could tell some war stories about each and every even but that would take forever to type out so i am being kinda genenaric ok.will fill in the blanks soon as they come to me.one such event can scarr you for life .ya know...i have so many such events that if my whole entire story was put totype i think the rocks themselves would cry...i hope that there is hope even thru my despire and agony of living these 32 years tormentent i still want to trust .that there is real love and there is real hope and there is good poeple somewhere in this world may i find them now...